Love Letter: To my gorgeous little boy

To the sweetest little boy I could ever ask for:

I sit here thinking of all the ways I could start this letter but the best way to start it is saying.. I love you. I am so grateful for the opportunity to be your mom. The love that I have experienced through being your Mom is unbelievable! I am so happy that your sweet spirit was sent to me. Seven months ago, I couldn’t believe I was going to have a baby! The first time I saw you, which was about an hour and a half after you were born, I couldn’t believe how gorgeous you were. Since then, you’ve grown so much! You are such a monster. Surpassing any expectations of what a child should be, you are the calmest, funniest and the best baby boy. I am excited to see you grow. I’m excited to watch you crawl for the first time, your first step, hear your first word and just watch you grow. There is so much ahead of you. I just pray and hope that I can be a good mommy to you. I pray that my shortcomings won’t get in the way of being your best friend. I want to be able to have you talk to me whenever you need me. I don’t want you to be afraid of me and be able to trust me with everything in your life. I hope that my experiences will be able to help you learn from my mistakes and grow from your mommy’s accomplishments.

Wow. I can’t believe how old you are. You truly are my best friend along with your daddy. I am glad that we are a family. I can’t wait to share your life with you. I love you Cayden. I always will love you, no matter what. I know you’ll know that in your life. I will always be there for you.

You love your blankie and it’s the cutest thing. You love your bouncy seat and you go nuts! You love lights on the ceilings and ceiling fans. Mirrors excite you. There could never be enough exciting things. Everything is exciting. And watching you learn is a rewarding experience.

I’m sorry for the times I get upset with you. I’m just tired and I do love you. But you know that because you’re quick to give me a smile or giggle. And in that instant, the frustration seems to float away. You make my day! You make the tiredness I feel seem like nothing. I get to raise you and see you learn and all your firsts. I am definitely willing to make the sacrifice I do so that I can be the one who teaches you day by day. You’re everything to me. I’d do anything for you. I love you so much Cayden Robert Benson. You will always have a place to call home and a mommy who loves you with all her heart. You are my little angel, my sunshine through rain and my life. I love you.